What can your mind learn, your heart embrace and your soul discover about success from a fortune cookie?

"An aim in life is the only fortune worth finding."
Robert Louis Stevenson

Over the past twenty plus years, I have made a point of collecting and cataloging the fortunes I received in fortune cookies. Now, I don’t believe there is anything mystical or magical that happens when I get a fortune cookie, but there is often a gift of wisdom and that’s pretty powerful magic by itself.

Fortune cookies not only provide sweetness at the end of a savory meal, they also can produce nourishment for the mind while culling a sense of appreciation for life within you. Sometime the urge is to look for an answer to something puzzling, like a set of winning lottery numbers. I have found that the secret to reading a fortune cookie is to look for the question you should be asking yourself that is relative to the advice the fortune cookie is communicating.

If you consistently look for the questions inside your fortune cookies you might find yourself on an amazing journey of self-examination fueled by the questions your fortune cookies have “asked”. Within these journeys you might encounter pieces of wisdom that your mind will learn, your heart will embrace, and your soul will discover about success.

Let me tell you about some of mine…

MIND OVER MATTER

In my early-forties, I received a fortune that did not change me physically, but it did change my way of thinking. At that time in my life, I had become preoccupied with death having witnessed my 69-yer old father lose his valiant bout with cancer. I worried about living long enough to witness the level of success and joy that he had in his life. Imagine the pressure I was placing on myself based on what I now know was an unrealistic expectation. After getting this fortune, it helped me to shift my mindset from the distant future to the immediate present. It also helped me realize that even under the worst outcomes, if I had my basic needs fulfilled, I would and could aim at fulfilling my unlimited potential. 

This is the fortune I received that changed how I have thought about life and success from that day forward, “Your blessing is being no more than safe and sound for the whole lifetime.”

Really? Great! Where do I go to sign up for that? 

If you’re thinking about how you will approach your success journey, it sure would help to know that you will be safe and sound for your whole lifetime. I know it did to me. I began to think about the word “lifetime”. A lifetime is just the span of one’s life. It is not defined by any measure of years, accomplishments or accolades. It is, as they say, “The dash”, between the dates on a tombstone. A lifetime is what you make of it. It does not need or beg for comparison to the lives of others to be of value. 

This little piece of fortune cookie wisdom encouraged me to ask,  “What it was that I really needed to live a successful life?” This hidden question helped me shift my thinking from what I thought I needed to be successful to what really mattered to me about living a successful life.

THE HEART OF A SMILE

I have always been a smiling person, although my dad was quick to point out I was a colicky baby and cried almost continuously for the first two years of my life. From my perspective, I was just getting all the tears out of my system so my naturally smiling character could shine through.

I don’t remember at what age I realized the power of my smile, but I know it has always been among my greatest assets. I like giving smiles away. To family, friends, colleagues and strangers. Smiles cost me nothing, are almost always returned to me immediately, and no matter how many I give away my supply of smiles is inexhaustible. Here’s a fortune I received that sums up my Smile Philosophy, “Smile. It makes your day brighter as well as the days of those around you.”

This small piece of advice encouraged me to ask, “Who benefits most when I share a smile?” My answer was simple, “I do.” When I share a smile, I get the high of releasing positive energy into the world around me. That positive energy has the potential to change the attitude of contention and the altitude of limitation in the world. Imagine the power of one small piece of paper to warm your heart and touch the hearts of others as well. That’s what this fortune was able to do for me.

SOUL PURPOSE

A significant portion of the success coaching I do with businesses, organizations and individuals consists of identifying the purpose, passion, and promises of their intended goals. For so many people, and for a very long time for me personally, success was an unsurmountable and elusive target. I never understood how to achieve it because I did not understand the simple nature of success. Like many people, I fixated on measuring success by the things I acquired, be they a position, some power or a possession.

In recent years, I have come to understand that most of the success I believe had eluded me was simply going unnoticed by me. And, as a result, I was never able to build and sustain the ultimate success I desired because I always seemed to be starting from square one with every effort. But now, I know differently. I have learned that success is not a single event set somewhere at the edge of a distant horizon. Success happens every day, if you just pay attention to it.

A fortune cookie once told me, "Success lies in the hands of those who want it."

This led me to ask the question, “Are you clearly and purposefully defining what you want enough to establish a clear and reasonable expectation of your intent.” When I discovered I wasn’t doing this, it helped me pave the way for striving to live a successful life by intent. In the simplest of terms, success is the achievement of an intent. Purpose, passion and promise are the foundational pillars successful people practice with confidence and consistency.

Success need not be measured by exorbitant achievements at all. In fact, to be successful most often requires you to recognize the smaller accomplishments that lay the foundation for larger ones down the road. The devil truly is in the details. Finding strength and confidence in the ability to consistently do the small things in life, is a critical step that can lead you to achieve a successful life.

THE SECRET TO SUCCESS

The cumulative effect of paying heed to fortune cookie wisdom is the level of awareness it will create in you when you follow the wisdom with an inquiring question. We live hurried lives, leaping from one second of inspiration to another, expecting something fantastic to happen along the way. This type of success strategy is akin to going into a multiplex theater and seeing a small fraction of each film they are showing. You might get a sense of each film, but you will not experience their complete stories. To truly make the theater going experience complete you have to invest the necessary time it will take to watch each film beginning to end. In other words, you must make a commitment, have an intent and expand your patience.

According to fortune cookie wisdom I received, "Success is usually the fruit of patience."

How sweet that is!

I want to thank those who have shared comments and suggestions with me and I’m looking forward to positively contributing to your life in the next year. Please continue to share your suggestions and comments with me. As always, I encourage you to freely share this post with friends and colleagues.

Bringing Positivity to Everything,
The Brain Tamer

Your Success will either DIE or LIVE on How You’re Thinking - Part II

“A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.”
Mark Twain

PART II

This is the second of a two-part blog that examines how “Your Success will either DIE or LIVE on How You’re Thinking.” In Part I we examined “The Natural Enemies of Promise” - Doubt, Indecision and Entropy. If you cannot defeat the Natural Enemies of Promise by changing how you think, the possibility of your promise will D.I.E.

In part two of how “Your Success will either DIE or LIVE on How You’re Thinking”, we will examine the Natural Allies of Promise that will enable you to L.I.V.E. the possibility of your promise.

I often hear people espouse about this dream and that dream and how they will, “Achieve it because they believe it!” Goody for them. Having a dream is a good start toward achieving the possibility of your promise. But, dreams can be misleading. What is a dream? It’s vaporware at best. You can’t hold it or mold it. A dream is born of your unconscious mind’s need to express a combination of experiences both vividly imagined and real into a synthesis that, for a fraction of time, makes sense.

If you want to use a dream as a platform for launching your toward reaching the possibility of your promise you will need to take it to the next step; converting your dream into a desire. Your success in converting that desire into a reality will L.I.V.E. on How You’re Thinking when you engage the Natural Allies of Promise as a framework for desire-based thinking.

THE NATURAL ALLIES OF PROMISE

The thinking-shift from a D.R.E.A.M. (a Deeply Rooted Emotionally Achievable Manifestation) to a D.E.S.I.R.E. (a Deeply Emotional Self-Interested Realistic Expectation) is pivotal if you want to reach the possibility of your promise. But, like all things, it’s tough to do it on your own. So, just like any project where you would look to fill in the gaps between your talent and your needs, the Natural Allies of Promise can help you fill the gaps in your desire-driven thinking, helping you keep focused on your intended goal. The Natural Allies of Promise are Longing, Intention, Viability, and Enthusiasm. Let’s briefly examine each’s role as a natural ally of promise.

Longing

When I was seven years old I saved up a bunch of box tops and sent away for a medal model of a red, Ford Thunderbird convertible. The process of waiting to receive that “prize” was my first exposure to desire-driven behavior. My yearning to hold that shiny red auto in my hands became the singular focus of an entire summer. I would plan my days around the mailman’s delivery schedule. In the days before tracking numbers, expectation that “today would be the day” was as close to instant gratification as I could get. My longing to achieve the possibility of the promise of this car as fulfillment of my expectation was the prime catalyst of my success.

Longing is a powerful ally in your desire to achieve something. A longing is more than an idle or passing thought. A longing is a persistent hunger for something accompanied by a burning, obsessive craving, unquenchable thirst to achieve a promise or reach an objective. A longing says you are in it for the long haul and it can be sufficient to sustain you through the temporary troths of your desire-driven thinking.

Intention

In my keynote presentation, “Hope Less Success”, I make a big deal out of telling my audiences there is no such thing as an accidental success. By the very definition of success (the achievement of an intention) you can see how crucial focused intention-based thinking is in achieving the possibility of your promise. In learning to LIVE your promise there is no substitute for intention. Intention is a keen awareness of your current state of progress toward your promise and the distance you will need to travel to close the gap between desire and achievement.

Intention is your internal resolve to do something; to be in control of the outcome as the active, driver of the initiative rather than a passive spectator willing to settle for the result regardless the score or its net effect on you. Intention is the “line in the sand” you will draw that says, “I will not retreat from where I stand. I will only move forward with every fiber of my body dedicated to achieving the possibility of my promise.

Viability

Success does not happen in a vacuum. It requires energy. Lots of it. Without a continuous supply of positive energy your drive to succeed will encounter the friction of entropy and will eventually erode both your attitude and aptitude. To counter this phenomenon, you will need to engage your viability engine.

Viability is your operational state of mind. It tells you that you cannot achieve the possibility of your promise without a deeply committed belief in the sustainability of your vision. Viability is your capacity for tenacity. It is that singular quality of mind that enables you to sustain your desire through belief in your promise’s right to exist. Viability is the reflection of both the competence and confidence you have in your ability to achieve the possibility of your promise.

Viability is your passport into the world of possibility where your desire can be actualized, limited only by your belief in your desire.

Enthusiasm

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.”

In short, there is no substitute for enthusiasm. Recently, I have encountered several startup companies whose reason for being has less to do with an enthusiasm for the customers they serve as it does for the “big pay day” when then can get acquired. Some of these companies are struggling to hang on. Some are finding it increasingly difficult to define themselves both internally and externally. Others are finding it difficult to attract both customers and investors because they have lost that “lovin’ feeling” for the enterprise they began.

Enthusiasm is an essential element of reaching the possibility of your promise. The phrase, “Do what you love, and the money will come”, is fantastic advice. When you have endless enthusiasm for what you do, your energy will be unlimited as well. Enthusiasm is a clear manifestation of mind over matter. When you hit “the wall”, encounter seeds of doubt, or begin to feel weary enthusiasm can provide the regenerative energy to jump start your desire-driven thinking and propel you toward achieving your promise.

THE CHOICE IS YOURS

Over the last two blogs we examined how Your Success will either DIE or LIVE on How You’re Thinking. In Part I, we looked at The Natural Enemies of Promise – Doubt, Indecision and Entropy and the roles they play in derailing you from achieving the possibility of your promise.

In Part II, we examined The Natural Allies of Promise – Longing, Intention, Viability and Enthusiasm and how they can be harnessed to redirect, reinvigorate and regenerate your desire-driven thinking en route to achieving the possibility of your promise.

Whether you are willing to let the possibility of your promise D.I.E. or L.I.V.E. is a matter of how you think. The choice is up to you.

Thanks for your support as a reader of my blog and I eagerly welcome any comments on how you’re thinking about achieving the possibility of your promise.  Also, I would appreciate any suggestions you might have for future posts in this blog on a topic near and dear to you in the comments section below. As always, please feel free to share this post with a friend or colleague.

Bringing Positivity to Everything,
The Brain Tamer

You can successfully profit from “A Labor of Love.”

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success.
If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”
Albert Schweitzer

Like most of you, I am mourning the "official" end of summer. So much potential for relaxation seemed to turn on the currents of urgency. Life, death, joy, and recovery were all part of "a summer to remember." And now, "It's back to work!"

I am looking forward to a return to something that is both routine and productive. Oddly, both of these things are a necessary part of work. Without routine, work tends to be haphazard, unstructured and quite possibly counterproductive. Without productivity, work is aimless, unaccountable and unquantifiable therefore rendering it meaningless and valueless. Work without value is like treading water, it may keep your head above water, but you are not making any progress. Even, a Labor of Love.

A LABOR OF LOVE

On the day before Labor Day, of our 33rd anniversary, my wife and I volunteered to work at a festival for a group we had never met, had no direct contact to and did not plan to join at any time in the future. When we got there, we found they lacked a great deal of the organization and know-how required to cook food for the masses. Both of us had significant festival food experience by virtue of being "band parents" for seven years (somewhere around 25,000 hamburgers served.) You never know when or which of the experiences in your life will be of the greatest value to others. For four hours we toiled under humid conditions without the proper tools or facilities. We improvised, encouraged, instructed and organized. In short, we had a ball! We couldn't have asked for a more reaffirming and rewarding experience as an exclamation point to this "summer to remember."

At the end of our shift, the organizer called us "Angels sent from God." I told him he should call my mother and let her know her son is an "angel." This Labor of Love really had extreme value in so many ways. First, we met new people, always a pleasant and vibrant experience. Second, we learned that even the little things we do can make a great difference to those in need. Third, we left an imprint on others that should kindle in them the ability to reach out to others who at some time in the future may need their help too. Lastly, on our anniversary, we reaffirmed our love for each other by sharing our "precious" time doing something "angelic" for strangers.

Intangible Value + Doing Something Joyful = A Labor of Love

GIVING RETURNS SUCCESS

I'm not sure how often you may have an opportunity to volunteer or just take the time to do something that doesn't cross your palm with anything but a handshake, but you should. Service to our fellow beings, human or animal, is one of the keys to understanding the universal question of "Why are we here?" We grow exponentially every time we reach out and connect with someone or some group. That growth is measurable yet infinite as long as it is embraced, not as a means to an end but, as a way of life. The concept of "Reaching out and touching" someone has less to do with communicating than it does with the love we should have for each other and the unique opportunity helping others affords each of us to enhance the total significance of all humanity. When the opportunity presents itself, choose to be a helpful person and you’ll experience a valuable element of a successful life. Remember, success is simply the achievement of an intention.

SAGE ADVICE

Albert Schweitzer was spot on when he said, “Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”. Whether you speak or lead people for a living, think about how valuable your skills might be to a cause in need. Having personally experienced the rewarding experience and “good feelings” I get every time my contributions help promote a worthy cause, I can't imagine my life without it. I encourage you to seek the opportunity to make a difference through a “labor of love”. When you do, the rewards of the experience will be priceless.

In this blog, I have introduced a formula. Formulas are a coaching tool I have used for years with profound results. Feel free to collect them and integrate them into your success strategies as you see fit.

Thanks for your support as a reader of my blog and I eagerly welcome any comments on this post or suggestions you might have for a future blog on a topic near and dear to you in the comments section below. As always, please feel free to share this post with a friend or colleague.

Bringing Positivity to Everything,
The Brain Tamer

Stop thinking about where you are, and start focusing more on where you need to be!

"Within all of us is a divine capacity to manifest and attract
all that we need and desire."
Wayne Dyer

Destinations are quirky things. They are often incubated in a vacuum, isolated from a myriad of variables and then adopted with blind ambition and dedication.

For aspiring speakers, the destination might manifest itself in a desire to be on a stage in front of a larger audience mesmerizing them with your profound observations and wisdom.

The urge to take to the stage without first determining the content and value of what you will say once you get there often proves to be a harsh reality, best experienced in solitude rather than in public.

The awkwardness of wanting something without assessing what you may need to acquire to obtain it is a dilemma I regularly find aspiring speakers struggling to overcome.

To get from where you are (the desire to speak) to where you need to be (having something worthwhile to say that is both deeply profound and well developed) is akin to choosing a destination and then figuring out how you will actually get there.

For every worthwhile destination, you must be willing to embrace the journey to get there.

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A TRIP AND A JOURNEY

We all know (at least you should after this blog) that life is not about the destination, it is about the journey. So, it makes sense to learn not to trip through life, but to enjoy the journey as you go.

A trip is an act of going to a place and returning. A great experience, but you have the tendency to end up exactly where you began. Trips do have destinations, but they limit themselves because of the expectation of returning to where you began.

If you are like most people, you take a trip to one place and back again nearly every day. Whether it is the commute to work or the “taxi” trips to and from dance lessons, sports, or the grocery. Most of these short-run, quick-return experiences happen in a nearly rote manner. Sometimes we complete the cycle with such detachment that we wonder if we actually have completed them.

But a journey offers you so much more in the pursuit of a destination.

A journey is an act of traveling from one place to another. It can also be a long and often difficult process of personal change and development.

What can elevate a trip from the mundane into true “journey” status is what happens to you along the way. Most importantly, what happens to you along the way is what will become the foundation of the value and wisdom you will share when you are speaking. So, ask yourself:

• What happened?

• Why did it happen?

• What did I learn from it?

• What am I going to do differently?

The process of becoming a successful speaker, whose theme and message offer value and substance to your audiences, requires the creating of a road map to assist you on the journey to your destination. Your road map needs only have three way-points:

1. Defining Your Destination

2. Discovering Your Intention

3. Designing Your Presentation

DEFINING YOUR DESTINATION

The speaking world consists of six tiers of speakers. I call this list “The Speaking World’s Hierarchy”.

Regardless of where you are as a speaker within this list, there will be things you must do or obtain to get to where you need to be. The tier you choose becomes your destination. You will need to study the destination and assess where you are and how much you will need to do to reach your destination. This assessment should include the level of your speaking desire (commitment), the depth of your content (foundational message development), and your platform delivery skills (stage presence). You will need all of these, extensively developed, to become a successful speaker and reach your destination.

DISCOVERING YOUR INVENTION

I’ve often heard a speaker encourage an audience to become more tenacious by citing the story of Thomas Edison’s invention of the light bulb as the result of nearly one thousand attempts. While this is true, is it hardly original content. Which leads me to wonder how many attempts at an original example of tenacity did this speaker make?

Becoming a successful speaker means you will need to discover your foundational message as the result of your own invention. It will exist after you have challenged yourself to pursue a line of thought or interest to its deepest level. From that valley you will rise with a powerful understanding and the “voice” and passion to share it.

To become a successful speaker, you will need to find your “voice”. This means you must find a way to refine all of what you know, feel and have experienced into a themed presentation that is uniquely yours. You cannot pretend to be something or someone you are not. Therefore, you cannot vastly copy or borrow from others. You must find and extract every piece of original precious material from the “nuggets” within your mind.

This process requires time, temperament and tenacity. It is not easy, especially when you have a lifetime of achievement, experience and wisdom you wish to share with your audiences.

It is at this stage of development that you might become bogged down in the mire of your own thinking. You can become overwhelmed by the torrent of thoughts streaming from your mind. Understanding how to extract and refine relevant and riveting content is the most essential step in becoming a successful speaker.

How can you reduce the “fire hose” of what you know, feel and have experienced down to the sprinkling of ideas you are compelled to share with an audience?

To succeed at this process, you will need to learn how to use mind mapping and story extraction tools. Many successful speakers also engage the guidance of a personal coach, as well, to help them through this stage.

Once you pass through this stage you will discover the invention of a foundational message you can trust and so will your audiences. Your new invention will speak to your core values, inspire others to action, motivate people to change thoughts and behaviors, and positively transform their lives.

DESIGNING YOUR PRESENTATION

The ultimate goal of every successful speech is for their speech to become memorable and repeatable. Your speech, no matter how essential the content may be, will not succeed if you do not reach these two critical outcomes.

So, in order to become a successful speaker, you will have to study how audiences think, listen and learn. It is not enough to have something to say, you must know how to say it effectively.

Here is a short list (from a much longer list) of some things you must do to successfully design your presentation.

• Choose each word with clear intention and understanding.

• Incorporate as many speech and pattern devices as you can to further your audience’s understanding and their desire to act on what you say.

• Place the stories you will tell to drive home the point you want to make in just the right spot.

• Know how to take and hold the stage with confidence in yourself and your content.

• Use your voice as a powerful communication instrument enabling your audience to embrace not just what you are saying, but how you are saying it.

• Use the speaking area to your fullest advantage to promote understanding and help lock in retention.

• Control all technology so that is enhances what you are saying without detracting or distracting the audience’s focus from you, the speaker.

DELIVERING ON DESIRE

To become a successful speaker requires you to take control of the whole process. As the late Dr. Wayne Dyer said, "Within all of us is a divine capacity to manifest and attract all that we need and desire."

If you desire to become a more successful speaker at work or as a profession, I urge you to stop thinking about where you are, and start focusing on where you need to be. Intensify your focus on obtaining all that you currently do not possess in order to reach your desired destination.

Change is a process and it will require time, temperament and tenacity from you to achieve it. While it is prudent to “keep your eyes on the prize”, remember the finish line comes at the end of the race not at the beginning, so focus your intention on every lap.

I’m delighted to have the opportunity of sharing how you can define, discover and design your journey towards becoming a successful speaker. I trust you will embrace this journey for all of the glory and exhilaration it can offer. I appreciate your support as a reader of my blog and I eagerly welcome any comments on this post or suggestions you might have for a future blog on a topic near and dear to you in the comments section below. As always, please feel free to share this post with a friend or colleague.

Bringing Positivity to Everything,
The Brain Tamer

Overcome these Challenges to Your Intention today, and you'll Achieve your Success tomorrow.

“Intention is the seed you sow today,
that will grow into the desired success you will reap tomorrow."
Don E. Smith

Why is success, for some people, as easy as getting out of bed, while for the rest of the world it is a constant, uphill struggle?

Would you like to be a success?

Who wouldn’t!

Have you ever asked yourself, “What does it take to become a success?”

Believe it or not, the answer to achieving success relies as much on how you think about the success process as it does on what you do to reach your goal. In many respects, you can’t have one without the other. If this confounds you, the question you might want to ask yourself is, “What is success?”

Success is defined as, “The achievement of an intent.”

So, right off the bat, this tells you two things about success. 1) you cannot achieve Success without Intent and 2). Success is never an accident. If you achieve your desire by either accident or chance, it’s called “Luck” and that’s rarely controllable or repeatable.

YOUR INTENTION TO SUCCEED

Success is all about Intention. Another way to put it is, “Intention is the seed you sow today, that will grow into the desired success you will reap tomorrow."

DESIRE + INTENTION = SUCCESS

But success is not without its challenges.

On every road you travel during a journey from intent to success you encounter three daunting challenges you will need to surpass. Each of these challenges is as deadly to the pursuit of your intent and ultimate success as the lack of water is to plants in a garden.

The Three Challenges to Success are Inertia, Entropy and Apathy.

Let’s examine each.

INERTIA

My Dad had his greatest business successes as an insurance agent. His passion to “do right by my clients” when offering them the best insurance and protection they could afford was the foundation of his sales philosophy. But, it wasn’t always easy. Very often, despite his client’s desire to own a successful insurance protection policy, they struggled to make the “buy” decision.

At that critical point in the sales meeting, my Dad would say, “To not decide, is to decide to do nothing.” Boy, was he right.

Many people seeking to become a success at attaining a skill or reaching a goal are deterred at the outset by their inability to move in any direction. This is a perfect example of Inertia.

Inertia is a tendency to do nothing or to remain unchanged. Albert Einstein once said, “If nothing changes, nothing changes.”

Making the commitment to take bold action or to shed all doubt and fear is a critical part of becoming successful. What you know, have and believe now is “safe” to you. It’s the Status Quo.

The best way to shake off the Status Quo, move toward the intent of your desire, and overcome a tendency toward Inertia is to build some “Trust” muscle. This muscle, like all muscle, will respond and strengthen through repeated flexing and testing. It’s all in your mind.

Following these steps will help you build your trust muscle:

1. Imagine the goal of your desire.

2. What is the smallest step you can take now?

3. Take it and pause.

4. How does it make you feel?

5. Are you feeling confident?

6. Great. You’re flexing and strengthening your trust muscle.

7. Think about the next step, maybe a little bigger than the last, and take it.

8. Continue and repeat each step as above and you will continually overcome Inertia.

One warning, however, Inertia can pop up at any time, especially when an interim success has been reached. It questions whether you are willing to give up the comfort of what you have just attained for the prospect of something new but unknown; something you’ve only dreamed about but have yet to experience. If this happens to you, refer to step one above.

Staying ahead of Inertia is a great way to build the enthusiastic momentum that will help you stave off Entropy.

ENTROPY

I first became aware of this success challenge while listening to Dr. Wayne W. Dyer’s “The Power of Intention” lecture. I was so completely enlightened by his explanation of entropy, that this concept has become one of the most essential elements in the success coaching I do for organizations, leaders, and speakers.

Entropy, the second law of thermodynamics, states that things have a universal tendency toward deterioration. I define it this way: No matter how much energy or enthusiasm you have at the start of something it will not be enough to sustain you to the finish line. In order to sustain and reach the desired success of your intention you will need to apply increasing amounts of energy (psychological and physical) to your current effort to overcome the natural tendency toward deterioration. If you don’t, you will run out of energy, lose focus, spiral down and fall short.

If I were to chart the declining effects of entropy, it might look like this:

The best way for you to overcome the obstacle of Entropy is to follow these steps:

1. Find ways to celebrate the small successes you will have along the way to the desire of your intention.

2. Make something out of these successes.

3. Do not let them go unnoticed or unrecognized.

4. But, do not rest on this interim success or think of it as your end-point.

5. Use this “waypoint” success to “pat” yourself on the back and recognize where you are and how far you have come in your success journey.

6. Keep entropy at bay by continuously increasing your enthusiasm and energy for the desired intention.

Otherwise, you may just find yourself fishing for a dream.

Speaking of “Goin’ Fishing”, let’s look at the obstacle that will surface if you don’t overcome Entropy, Apathy.

APATHY

Years ago, I was president of an organization in desperate need of additional funds to pay for a special program. One day the organization was offered a “godsend” opportunity to host an event doing something it already did once a year that would have solved its special funds need. When I put it to a vote of my executive committee, my two VP’s of Ways and Means (a fancy name for fund raising) said “they did want to work that hard” and withdrew their support of the motion. The motion failed, and the money never came.

I firmly believe that there is no such thing as a bad volunteer, and I don’t fault these people for feeling the way they did. I am just serving this up as a perfect example of Apathy.

Apathy is a lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern for something. It could be a goal, a relationship or a cause. All it means is that you have given up and surrendered your influence on the outcome without quitting altogether.

In this photo below, the fisherman hasn’t quit fishing, but he has detached himself from the active process. Technically, the two sticks in the water are doing the fishing because they are holding the fishing pole. If he catches a fish, it will be mostly by accident or as just a random result of his intention. Not quite Luck, but definitely a whole lot of Hoping.

The best way to overcome Apathy is to follow these steps:

1. Reevaluate the desire of your intention.

2. Determine if it still drives you with a sense of urgency.

3. Chart the progress you have made to date.

4. Analyze how far you have to go.

5. Imagine what it will be like to achieve the desire of your intention.

6. Challenge any on-setting feelings of Inertia you might be experiencing by taking one more, small step forward.

Remember, you are the master of your success. No one else will give it to you.

THE SWEET SENSE OF SUCCESS

Success is a wonderful feeling. It tickles the senses. Think of how people refer to success. The sweet taste of success or the sweet smell of success.

Success signals the end point of a journey of enriching experience, steadfast determination and reliable internal trust. Success achieved means you have overcome Inertia, Entropy and Apathy; the three obstacles everyone encounters on the way from a dream (desired intention) toward achievement.

Remember, every journey toward success, every project, every organizational initiative, every presentation, every relationship is challenged by these three obstacles. The degree to which you can control your success will be greatly enhanced when you learn how to take bold steps and break the status quo, harness your enthusiasm by adding new levels of celebration and reward, and focus on staying in the game by climbing back up the horse after a fall.

Intention is the seed you will use to grow the success of your desired intention. You hold that seed in your hands. Plant it, nurture it and harvest it and you will be rewarded for your efforts.

I trust you read this blog with the maximum amount of Intention and that it will help you understand the nature of success and how to have more of it in your personal and professional life. I appreciate your support as a reader of my blog and I welcome any comment on this post or suggestions you might have in the comments section below. As always, please feel free to share this post with a friend or colleague.

Bringing Positivity to Everything,
The Brain Tamer

How to Look and Sound Genuine When Speaking to a Camera

"All emotion is involuntary when genuine."
Mark Twain

You may have noticed that video cameras are everywhere!

Nearly everyone has immediate access to a video recording device and they use it to document the important events of their life. There are also a bunch of voyeuristically naive people who live to “catch” a stranger’s “worst nightmare” and then post it on the internet hoping to achieve viral notoriety at someone else’s expense.

Knowing there is a potential for you to be caught off guard and have your integrity virally impugned is a pretty scary thing. The best defense is to always behave properly, act honestly and be genuine. I can’t guarantee you’ll be immune from the amateur paparazzi, but you just might not draw their attention.

Then there is the other side of the coin… the self-inflicted, self-orchestrated video that is painful to watch and does little to enhance one’s stature. There is a trend gaining ground that requires business owners, self-employed, and entrepreneurs to promote their products, services and personal brand on the internet and in social media through the use of video. When creating a video, you must be aware of two pivotal elements, 1) how you sound and 2) how you look.

Every person who approaches this process has two choices, 1) to do it well or 2) to do it at a low, casual level. If you’re considering making a video of yourself, the question you should be asking is, “What do I want people to remember most about the video I am making?”

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE COIN: TAILS

I recently counseled a young man with incredible speaking talents regarding a series of videos he posted on his LinkedIn site. His passion for conveying life lessons and advice on leadership is amazing, but his videos, due to their overtly casual nature, did everything they could to distract from the core of his message. In one video he is talking to his smart phone while driving his car, breaking eye contact with the road several times to face the camera. As a viewer, I was unpleasantly watching, hoping I would not bear witness to a horrible accident. We all recognize that one of the current harbingers of calamity in our society is the distracted driver. We’d all like to do everything we can to eliminate this dangerous behavior. But, the distracted speaker? Honestly, if what you have to say is so darn important, show us some respect. Take the time to put your best effort forward in a thoughtful, clear and undistracted fashion.

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE COIN: HEADS

I have worked with a number of my clients, past and present, facing the video dilemma with trepidation on the best way they can be “in control” of the process, remain genuine, and enjoy the final product in the end. From the outset, I stress upon them how important it is to understand that even the most casual touch still demands the best form of communication.

The best communication means with the least distractions or interferences. Try to imagine watching a TV show with lots of static or data drops. It makes for a very taxing experience. As a leader or spokesperson your goal is to create a video that is purged of all interferences, allowing your brand, message and personality to come through unfiltered and at its full impact potential. You can afford to do no less.

But how? Surely it is harder than it appears.

THE HARD ROAD TO EASY STREET

It’s been said that Steve Jobs would rehearse for 17 hours or more for one of Apple’s annual presentations. So, whether you’re thinking the process of looking and sounding genuine in front of a camera is hard or easy you’re right on both accounts. It all depends on how you approach the process. Begin by giving thought to the items below:

• What topic and key points have you identified to talk about?

• How much time have you devoted to thinking about what you want to say?

• How much have you practiced responses to the questions you intend to answer?

• How much practice have you had before a camera prior to your “real” recording opportunity?

• Have you received candid feedback on your practice “performances”?

When you’ve considered all of these process questions your task will either be hard or easy depending on the degree of effort you have put forth. You get to choose which road you’d want to take.

HOW TO LOOK AND SOUND GENUINE

Your ability to Look and Sound genuine can be achieved by exhibiting these three qualities of being genuine:

• Controlling your energy

• Commanding your content

• Conveying your authenticity

Controlling your energy is a nonverbal skill.

Even high-powered CEO’s can do this poorly. Tim Cook, CEO of Apple paces so much, they have had split the screen with one camera following him and another on the Keynote slides. Unfortunately, his bad habit is now becoming systemic as more and more Apple presenters fall into this “style”.

There is nothing wrong with standing still and making your point. The more you move, the harder the audience finds it to be able to concentrate on what you are saying. Learn how to control your energy.

Being able to control your energy includes:

• Taming your wild hands (hair touching, ear scratching, beard stroking, etc.) by having a plan for the use of purposeful and meaningful gestures.

• Having a clear and unstrained voice that speaks at a controlled rate with solid volume and a pleasant pitch.

• Limiting needless body movement including uncontrolled pacing.

• Starting and ending with a smile or assuring face (if your delivering somber news).

• Making solid eye contact and looking at the camera as you would a good friend.

Commanding your content is a verbal skill.

We’ve heard for years that “Content is King”. This is not something new to the digital age. What you say has, is and always be the most important part of any communication. When you ask a viewer to stop and pay attention to you, you’d better be as clear and swift to your point as you can be.

Try following these three simple content command rules:

• Know what you want to say.

• Know how you want to say it.

• Know who is going to see and hear it.

Conveying your authenticity is a social skill.

Authenticity is not charisma. Charisma (a compelling attractiveness or charm) is a perceived quality.

Authenticity is an earned quality. It is acquired through a consistency of behavior that stands the tests of reliability and credibility.

Authenticity can be described as being legitimate, valid, dependable, trustworthy, accurate and truthful. Authentic leaders and speakers convey a sense of believability in how and what they say. In return their audiences place a higher level of their confidence in the products, brands, services and messages they represent.

A great deal of this authenticity comes from the level of self-esteem and self-confidence the speaker has in the content they share, the level of fluency they have on the topic, and the comfort they have speaking about it.

THE GENUINE SPEAKER

If you’re thinking about making a video to promote your brand, company or idea your goal is to be perceived as genuine. This means, don’t try to be anyone but yourself. Know what it is you want to say and how you want to say it. Think about the immortal nature of digital video and its lasting impact on you and your business. Don’t try to do it alone. Solicit the assistance of a colleague or coach to increase your effectiveness.

It truly is easy to look and sound genuine in front of a camera if you put the work in behind the scenes.

I am genuinely delighted to share these insights on How to Look and Sound Genuine in Front of a Camera. Please feel free to share this post with a friend or colleague. As always, I am grateful for your support as a reader of my blog and I welcome any comment on this post or suggestions you might have in the comments section below.

Bringing Positivity to Everything,
The Brain Tamer